As for the directing role – qawamah – that men have over women, mentioned in Qur’an 4:34,
The question does not offend me. If you object to what is decreed in the Qur’an you are offending the Qur’an not me. Furthermore, you are referring to very specific circumstances in which you have been successful in employment and earnings. What about the majority of women in the western, as well as what is called the third world, who depend on a breadwinner?
Qawamah in the above ayah refers to decision making. You cannot have two managing directors in one company. One has to have the final word at times of disagreement.
This is not a modern dilemma; it is as old as the hills. The Lady Khadijah (A.S) was one such wealthy successful lady. When she employed the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) to work for her, she was in charge of the business, but when she married him the final word was his in their marital affairs.
There is no problem whatsoever for a woman such as yourself to continue your career and business without having to defer in any way to your husband. But you should correctly consult your husband in those matters which relate to your marriage.