A girl wishes to marry a man who is already married. Her father refuses to give his consent, and has put so many strict conditions for him regarding her future life that the married man cannot possibly accept them. What does Islamic law say about:a. A father opposing his daughter’s decision so vehemently. b. A father refusing to allow his daughter to marry a man who is extremely pious, religious, educated, a high earner and one who is prepared to fulfil all Islamic conditions regarding justice and fairness.

Is it permissible for a wife to perform oral sexual intercourse for her husband?

I accepted the logic and rationality of the faith – din – and have been Muslim for five and a half years. Allah Almighty makes clear how Merciful, Compassion and Just He is. I am not a scholar but I clearly do understand this.Muslims frequently speak of: the importance of women; their greatness and how much they are treasured; women’s modesty; the way in which Allah Almighty directs us to act; the manner in which we should be treated and how no other religion has given women as many rights. Muslims love to publicise that Allah granted Muslim women freedoms that western women are only now beginning to fight for.I am tired of seeing the vast discrepancies between their words and their actions. I understand that it is impossible for anyone to control or direct the actions of over one billion people, but I write because something has to be done about the misuse of fixed-term marriage.I have spoken to many Shi’ah muslimahs and none deny its validity and applicability. But it is beginning to have a deleterious effect on Shi’ah families and this is exacerbated by the response/lack of response of scholars – alims. They seem to unconditionally condone the actions of men. They say, ‘Men are permitted to do this’ or, they turn their faces away and pretend not to see it.Many brothers in permanent marriages also enjoy fixed-term marriage. Everyone knows what is going on, what is happening, except for their wives. When they find out, the effect is often quite devastating.Everyone reacts to situations differently. A few women turn away from Islam, not that this isthe correct thing to do, but as a reaction borne out of frustration, hurt and anger. Othersremove their headcover and modest clothing – hijab – and even though they continue to refer to themselves as Muslim, have faith – iman – so weakened that they no longer practise Islam. Yet others accept their situation or pretend it has not happened. A minority seem able to accept it wholeheartedly. However, what concerns me is the effect this has on women, children and Shi’ah families in general. I can attest to the effect it had on my own marriage, as I am presently in the process of getting a divorce. My decision was not based solely on the fixed-term – mut’a – marriage of my ex-husband, there were other factors involved. But, mut’a was the final straw which convinced me I should apply for a divorce.It disgusts me that, with all the information available on sexually transmitted diseases and Aids, this form of marriage is still so highly sought after. Surely the Muslim community needs to exert more restraint, and to accept that Aids is already in our communities. If measures are not taken now, Muslim society will be affected to the same extent as non-Muslim society.

I am a 21-year-old Shi’ah muslimah from a Sayyid family who is in love with a non-Sayyid Sunni man who wants to marry me. Although his parents agree to this, my parents disapprove. They claim a Sayyida should never marry a non-Sayyid. Is it true that a Shi’ah muslimah should not marry a Sunni man? Is that considered a sin?I have lived with my foster parents since I was one year old, and consider them my real parents. While my biological parents do not know anything about my marriage intentions, my foster parents are completely against it. Please guide me as I have decided that I will do whatever my religion permits.

I live in America, am 26, and have been married for the last year to my cousin from Canada who is the same age. Neither of us had any sexual experience prior to marriage. When I discovered I was unable to maintain an erection strong enough to effect penetration, I immediately sought medical advice. After months of tests an ultrasound investigation disclosed that I have eight minor venous leaks. The doctor thinks that my physical condition and the psychological distress of failure have compounded my problem. To help maintain penile erection, he now suggests that I employ a plastic/rubber ring.Our marriage has not yet been consummated, although we have been married for over a year. Throughout all this time my wife has been extremely patient. She has accompanied me on all my visits to the doctor and has always been thoroughly supportive. However, when the ring option was mooted she absolutely refused to allow me to use it.Later on she learned that she has the right to an annulment because our marriage has not been consummated. I returned to America, my wife to Canada to await an immigration appointment preparatory to entering the United States. However, since she has been waiting in Canada she has decided that she does indeed want the marriage to be annulled. I tried to talk her out of it, but she is insistent and is only coming here to pick up her things before leaving me.1. After discovering the cause of the problem in August of 1999, should I have offered herthe option to leave me? Is it the duty of a husband to tell his wife it is her decision to stayor leave?2. Only Allah Almighty knows what will happen in the future, if my problem will get better or worse. When I tried to convince her to stay I was told I was being selfish. On the one hand I understand that diagnosis has taken a very long time. On the other, I do feel I should be given the opportunity to prove myself, even if it requires me to use a rubber ring. Please let me know if you feel this is selfish of me? I welcome any criticism, for the goal is to become a better person for the hereafter.3. How does one perform an annulment? Once annulment has taken place what restrictions are there on us getting re-married in the future? Is it similar to a divorce?4. Should I attempt to reconcile the marriage or simply accept her decision and walk away? Please advise me regarding this. I am thoroughly confused about what to do. It seems as though I do not have any option and have to accept her decision.

My brother married his first cousin (our mother’s sister’s daughter) two years ago. They had a son 11 months ago who, after an MRI scan, has been diagnosed as having Leigh’s disease, a deterioration of the brain stem. The boy suffers from the destruction of his inner organs, loss of muscle movement as well as loss of sight and hearing. Research findings indicate that death normally follows shortly after this disease develops in the brain. All indications are that, depending on the extent of mutated cells found in this boy’s muscle tissue, at least one in every four of their children, will be born with this defect.With such odds, what is your ruling regarding my brother having further children?

According to Islamic jurisprudence, may a man request his wife dance with him without musical accompaniment?

Is it acceptable to watch movie actors kissing each other on the lips?

Is oral sex allowed?

Is anal sex allowed?

According to Islamic jurisprudence, may one pleasure one’s wife with a vibrator?

I would appreciate advice regarding the following. The young lady is a British-born Sayyida whose parents immigrated here from Pakistan, the young man a Sayyid from Hyderabad, India. Sayyid identifies descendants of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) through Imam Ali (A.S). Both are practising believers – mumins – and would like to marry each other.To assist her family in its enquiries, when he proposed, the young man presented them with a copy of his family tree. He also provided the names and addresses of character witnesses in India as well as of his cousins in England. Initially, the girl’s family asked a Hydrabadi, returning for her son’s wedding, to investigate the young man’s family. She came back with the news that they are ‘good people’. Regrettably, the girl’s family did not approve because he is from India. Her brother consulted a cleric who said, ‘Its better you don’t get into this. Find her someone suitable in Pakistan, at least her children will then be Pakistani.’ May Allah forgive me – Astaghfirullah – this is not the attitude our beloved Prophet (PBUH) and Imams (A.S) taught us. When this young man asked her family for their decision, they asked to see the original of his family tree! They have treated him so very badly that, had he not been a true mumin, he would have left them a long time ago. The girl’s father died on Hajj a few years ago and her grandfather has also passed away. In Islam, neither uncles, brothers or other relatives have any rights in this matter, and she is free to proceed with her plans.What should be done?

A married lady with four children turns to Islam through the blessed path of the progeny of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) – Ahl al-Bayt (A.S), while her husband declines Islam but agrees not to place obstacles in her way. If Muslim women may not marry non-Muslims on either a permanent or fixed-term basis, may she continue her marriage with him?What should she do and what is the status of the marriage?

According to Islamic jurisprudence, is it appropriate for husband and wife to read each other erotic literature?

Some six months ago a friend confided his enjoyment from an illicit relationship. However, he recently told me that, to keep from haram, he was going to marry a very worthy Muslim lady – muslimah – whom I regard as a good friend. Should I warn her of his dissolute past?

As a self-supporting 25 year-old male I have chosen, as my life partner, a compatible, distantly related young woman from our community. While my fiancée’s parents are overjoyed by our impending marriage, my father is displeased. He is upset because he felt that it should have been he who chose my wife for me and that to do so was his right and duty.Is he correct? The whole family agrees with my choice but feel obliged to defer to the ‘head of the family’. Does a man require his parents consent to marry someone of his own choice?

I am an American woman, married for eight months to an Iranian. Although I have a general idea of Allah Almighty’s basic laws regarding husband and wife, there are things I am not clear about.My husband accused me of talking to a non-Muslim man who lives in our area. I denied this, and by Allah who holds my life in His hands, I told the truth. At my husband’s request, I bathed – ghusl – and repented for all my sins – tawbah. I then took up the Qur’an and asked Allah Almighty to punish me if I told a lie. He also asked Allah’s punishment if it was not true that he believes me. However, all this was of no use because, even though he said he believed me, he does not and continues to bad mouth and accuse me.I want our marriage to work but he now tells me it is haram for him to take care of me or to give me money despite the fact that I work to pay the rent and other bills. It is very difficult for me to hear the bad things that he says to me. But Allah al-Rahman, knows that I do listen to my husband and do whatever he wants me to do, even though it is becoming exceedingly difficult for me to continue doing so. I do not want to stop and thus displease Allah.What is the law concerning this? He does not want to go to any religious teacher – shaykh – for help because he says none here can help. He is more learned than I am and says we have to help ourselves. I need help to keep a clear heart to prevent myself hating him and thus incurring Allah’s displeasure. Please advise me.

If a Muslim girl falls in love with a non-Muslim, how should the situation be resolved?

I am 21 and plan to marry my 19-year-old fiancée in two years’ time. We have great love for each other, which arouses equally great passions of love and affection. When we met after a three-month separation we were so excited that we could not stop ourselves from embracing and hugging and kissing each other.We fear Allah and do not know what to do. Our financial situation is such that we cannot marry for another two years, we live in a Pakistani Sunni society in which fixed-term marriage – mut’a – is disapproved, but Allah knows we also cannot control ourselves. Please advise me how we may avoid sin.

I met my husband to be, an Indian Muslim, at college. It was his influence which guided me to the Right Path. Now an Indian Muslimah convert, we have been married for four years and have one child. Although we married as per the shari’ah applicable in Saudi Arabia, my parents-in-law, regrettably, have not accepted me or our marriage. For peace of mind, and to please the family, we had a second marriage ceremony in Iran. This however has made no difference at all to my parents-in-law who refer to a scholar – alim – who claims to be in contact with the 12th Imam in occultation - Imam Zaman (A.S). He apparently says that he has been informed by the Imam (A.S) that I am an unbeliever – kafir – and that our marriage is forbidden – haram. He tells my in-laws that everything I do is pretence and that neither I, nor my husband, if he remains with me, are to join in any Shi’ah gatherings. When my mother-in-law happened to attend a meeting at which I was present she requested the others to send me away. They did not and she left in anger.Is it possible for that alim to be in contact with Imam Zaman (A.S), and would he make such comments? Is our marriage legal? May I attend Shi’ah gatherings?I am disheartened and disappointed and would greatly appreciate your response.